122 - When you collide into someone in the dark

I live with my grandparents and my aunt, but a few years back, my aunt was living in Toronto and I was sleeping in her room, and my bedroom used to be my mother's. My computer and my desk used to be in the living room, and in the daytime, this annoyed me quite a lot because everybody sitting on the sofa would be looking at what I was doing on the computer, looking at me work, staring at me eat at my desk, gawking at me every time I stood up, or sat down, or suddenly had a phone call that made my phone go vvvt vvvt.

That's when I started staying up at night. I loved the privacy I had to myself to watch 'sensitive' TV shows like Nip/Tuck and Oz, movies like sex-loaded American Pie or freaky horrors like The Exorcist and The Eye. I could stay up all night talking to my friends on the phone, webcamming them, without my family staring at me the whole time, judging me whenever I went into the kitchen just for a snack two times every hour, whenever I stood up to just stretch my legs and shake them about, sing to myself if I wanted to, anything, because the night was mine.

But one thing I noticed during these few years is that my grandfather pees very frequently. He gets up at 1am, 3am and 5am, always those times, always three times, always on time, to pee.

Let me just explain my severe need to bring this up. I'm quite frustrated about this, because you see, this is something quite inappropriate to bring up with a girlfriend, or with your classmates at the dinner table. I'm obligated to keep matters relating to my grandpa's visits to the bathroom to myself. Years of this hurts me, it physically hurts me.

...but anyway, he pees a lot. And since getting my own room, I have encountered him in the dark hallway leading to the bathroom on several occasions when I have felt the urge to urinate. I hate the feeling of bumping into him, because I feel like a total wuss, afraid of an old man in the hall, but I hate it more because I know he's aged and can't take that sort of surprise. I'm really afraid I might literally scare the life out of him.

Ah, well, but he was a firefighter for forty years. I'm sure he'll be around for a long time, no matter how many times we happen to have our bladders in sync. I guess I just hate the feeling of being frightened over nothing.

Ever collided into someone in the dark? Don't you hate the feeling too?

106 - Leaving the potty seat on the toilet bowl

I've had seven hours of school, which luckily featured the mundane Othello, mind-boggling mathematical set theory, a very boring hour-long physics class about how a CD works, and major grilling by my chemistry teacher about some missing assignments.

I've had a long day. I don't need to find my three-year-old cousin's potty seat... there when I simple would like to satisfy my urge to pee. I just - want - to take - a piss.

I don't need it.

I don't need it, I tell you. I don't need the horridly happy horses, and the creepily cute cats, and the foul, funny frogs, and the damn distasteful DOGS, welcoming me to my daily urination after school.

Who the Hell left it there?!?!

75 - Empty tissue roll in the toilet

Today, I came to the realization that since the new year began, I have gone to use the bathroom in our apartment quite a number of times (as most people do). It has occurred to me that I have been the unfortunate one who has to had to change the toilet roll four consecutive times in a row. I have had to go in there four times this year and every time, I have found an empty or near-empty roll there in that slot on my bathroom wall. It makes me wonder if my family are purposefully timing their visits to the bathroom, and regulating the amount of toilet paper they pull out, so that I'm the unwitting victim that has to perform the chore every time I go in there to do #2.

If it happens for a fifth time, I am addressing the issue at the dinner table.

50 - When a lady leaves a pad in the toilet bowl and doesn't flush

Pretty self-explanatory and I don't want to elaborate too much. Yes, caught sight of one in the bowl today when I went to take my shower after school. I thought taking a photo would be too extreme. As if not flushing wasn't enough...

31 - Piss on the toilet seat

I live with my grandparents and my grandfather can't quite aim into the bowl. Being the only other male suspect living here, my family sometimes think that I'm the one that can't aim (the fact that my grandfather, in dismay, denies it doesn't help my case), which is why I wipe the seat with toilet paper for the sake of this family's wellbeing. I'm not upset with my grandfather, I don't feel anything towards today's topic. The sight of it is just upsetting, don't you think?

...If I'm being honest here, I don't know what else to say. It's a surprisingly sensitive subject. I mean, it's urine. On your toilet seat. Need I say more?

Guys, if you accidentally let a few drops land on the seat, wipe it up. Okay?