115 - Not being 100% economical

I usually take a shower in the morning because I'm the kind of guy that needs to go to bed once he gets home, and needs to be splashed with water in order to awaken and be ridden of his drowsiness. And this morning, I was squirting out shampoo from the shampoo bottle while I was in the shower, and after I had taken my share and artfully smooshed it all over the top of my head, I checked to see how much shampoo was left, and it was empty.

...Or was it?

You see, I knew there was still shampoo in that thing, there's always some leftover inside, right?

So, I turned the nozzle counter-clockwise until the nozzle came off, and I let water go in, I rinsed it out and poured it all over my head, so I could save what my family would probably have thrown away upon discovery of the bottle's vacancy. I was being resourceful.

But sadly, this seems to be the only way I can minimize wastage. I hate how we can never really get all the butter out of a tub, or all the peanut butter out of a jar. When the ketchup or mustard runs out, I just know there's a couple of milliliters of sauce stuck on the insides, but lack the fluidity to ooze all the way downwards to that little opening. Similarly to squeezing sauce out of the sauce packets you get from fast-food chains, all the strength you can muster and apply to a flexible toothpaste tube will never get all the toothpaste out.

Things that come in tiny granules like baby powder, cheese, sugar, flour, artsy glitter, and salt and pepper, tend to get stuck to the bottom of the container, or caught in between the lid and the rim. You never use it all up.

With food on a plate, everything on mine has to be swallowed, not a single grain of rice left, not even a little broccoli bud, not even a teensy weensy tiny puddle of soup in my bowl. I eat the lettuce, cucumbers and tomatoes salad that go on the side of satay or chicken wings. I lick the spoon, the fork and the knife (this is not allowed, though, right?) after eating. I chew on the residual ice after hydrating myself with an iced beverage.

But the one uneconomical thing that irks me the most comes from drinking drinks out of an aluminum can.

Let's say you take a sip, slowly. You grasp on to the can, and feel the cold condensation on the sides. You kiss the rim of the can, and feel how your lower lip just fits right there on to the curved edge of it. You raise your chin in a manner that looks like your hair's being pulled from behind, and you feel the liquid trickling out of the can, maybe on to your tongue (if you're French kissing the can), and down your throat so fluidly.

You set the can down, and wait ---
what's this? ---
WHAT'S THIS?!?!?! ---
there's some liquid STUCK on the rim where your lips used to be! ---
OH, MY GOD!!! ---
OH NOEZZZ!!!11 ---
oHeMGee1111 ---
lik dat iz so wacki duuuuuuuude ---
gar ban ugdgdgwengo gwengo eneeko????? ---
^!$!&&!$!$#*$!#%$# ---
.....
....
...
..
.
*ahem*

Yeah, I hate the residual liquid that comes after ever sip. I have to make sure I suck it up every single time, but it's well worth it for me.

I also have a big problem with rubbish that piles up in a rubbish bin. I reckon this is just me being weird... I usually reach for a tissue, place it on the top, and flatten everything down so that more can be placed in a given volume. Makes sense, right?

But then, I take it too far sometimes, and I guess I don't know my own strength. You'd be surprised about how much litter you can actually fit in a bin...

8 - Gluttony

After a week of complaining about other people's misdeeds, I thought it would be interesting for all of my readers, followers and random pop-by visitors to learn more about some of my own bad habits. I said a week ago that everybody has dysfunctional behavioral tendencies and myself is included! To my good friends that know me outside the blogging world: you knew a self-dissing post was bound to be written some day. But instead of just one, I will be writing a full week's worth of posts demonstrating the hypocrisy in me. That's right. Seven entries about the things that I hate doing, and I hate the fact that I do them too. (I'm getting a little bit scared of where this might lead...)

As you've probably shrewdly figured out already, one of the annoying things that I do, but don't condone myself is being greedy when it comes to food. I remember an end-of-year party we had at school, where everybody in the class brought in candy, nachos, Lay's, Pringles, tortilla chips, soft drinks, Cheetos and pretzels to celebrate the fact that we had successfully completed another year of school. We moved the tables together to the middle of the room, and laid down all the food in the center. The teacher put on a movie and turned on the projector, and we sat down around the table of junk food and began to watch it.

Being the end of the year, we had no work to do, nothing to stress us out. Of course, the movie was nice, but we took this opportunity to chat as well before the summer holidays would separate us for two months. While everybody was chatting, I sneakily moved the food around so that I could sit right in the middle amongst all the food. Like an octopus, I reached in all directions, grabbing different potato chips and other snacks to keep my mouth interested and my stomach constantly at work. My classmates, one by one, began to see my dreadfulness, but they just let me be and in the end, I distinctly recall a Coca Cola chugging contest with one of my friends, although I don't remember exactly how that happened...

I can remember many times where I have asked the waiter to bring me more food than I actually needed (often, when the food is not going to be paid for by me). I will hog the popcorn at the movies, seize four-sixths of a whole pizza and take advantage of buffets by giving myself very generous portions. When I'm on a plane, I will press that button twenty to thirty times, thus summoning the air stewardess so that I can ask for peanuts and tomato juice for the entire flight's duration.

I hate seeing this greediness in other people, and looking back at my own gluttonous behavior, I hate seeing it in myself too. I'm surprised nobody has ever accused me of this before... I guess my friends and family are all being kind to me. I like spending time with others that love to eat as well. That way, I don't feel so guilty and I have someone else that can't control their appetite, however, when dining with people that can moderate their hunger, I find myself very unjust and self-indulgent.

It is a matter of self-control, self-control that I have never been able to find in myself, self-control that I have never needed to have because food is there for me whenever I want it. Even if people can have food whenever they want it, they still shouldn't eat more than their fair share, or eat more than they actually need to make them full.

What do you think, readers? Do you hate it too?