Monday, February 23, 2009

115 - Not being 100% economical

I usually take a shower in the morning because I'm the kind of guy that needs to go to bed once he gets home, and needs to be splashed with water in order to awaken and be ridden of his drowsiness. And this morning, I was squirting out shampoo from the shampoo bottle while I was in the shower, and after I had taken my share and artfully smooshed it all over the top of my head, I checked to see how much shampoo was left, and it was empty.

...Or was it?

You see, I knew there was still shampoo in that thing, there's always some leftover inside, right?

So, I turned the nozzle counter-clockwise until the nozzle came off, and I let water go in, I rinsed it out and poured it all over my head, so I could save what my family would probably have thrown away upon discovery of the bottle's vacancy. I was being resourceful.

But sadly, this seems to be the only way I can minimize wastage. I hate how we can never really get all the butter out of a tub, or all the peanut butter out of a jar. When the ketchup or mustard runs out, I just know there's a couple of milliliters of sauce stuck on the insides, but lack the fluidity to ooze all the way downwards to that little opening. Similarly to squeezing sauce out of the sauce packets you get from fast-food chains, all the strength you can muster and apply to a flexible toothpaste tube will never get all the toothpaste out.

Things that come in tiny granules like baby powder, cheese, sugar, flour, artsy glitter, and salt and pepper, tend to get stuck to the bottom of the container, or caught in between the lid and the rim. You never use it all up.

With food on a plate, everything on mine has to be swallowed, not a single grain of rice left, not even a little broccoli bud, not even a teensy weensy tiny puddle of soup in my bowl. I eat the lettuce, cucumbers and tomatoes salad that go on the side of satay or chicken wings. I lick the spoon, the fork and the knife (this is not allowed, though, right?) after eating. I chew on the residual ice after hydrating myself with an iced beverage.

But the one uneconomical thing that irks me the most comes from drinking drinks out of an aluminum can.

Let's say you take a sip, slowly. You grasp on to the can, and feel the cold condensation on the sides. You kiss the rim of the can, and feel how your lower lip just fits right there on to the curved edge of it. You raise your chin in a manner that looks like your hair's being pulled from behind, and you feel the liquid trickling out of the can, maybe on to your tongue (if you're French kissing the can), and down your throat so fluidly.

You set the can down, and wait ---
what's this? ---
WHAT'S THIS?!?!?! ---
there's some liquid STUCK on the rim where your lips used to be! ---
OH, MY GOD!!! ---
OH NOEZZZ!!!11 ---
oHeMGee1111 ---
lik dat iz so wacki duuuuuuuude ---
gar ban ugdgdgwengo gwengo eneeko????? ---
^!$!&&!$!$#*$!#%$# ---
.....
....
...
..
.
*ahem*

Yeah, I hate the residual liquid that comes after ever sip. I have to make sure I suck it up every single time, but it's well worth it for me.

I also have a big problem with rubbish that piles up in a rubbish bin. I reckon this is just me being weird... I usually reach for a tissue, place it on the top, and flatten everything down so that more can be placed in a given volume. Makes sense, right?

But then, I take it too far sometimes, and I guess I don't know my own strength. You'd be surprised about how much litter you can actually fit in a bin...

5 comments:

Marcy said...

I'm in agreement here. I shove down the trash too in order to fit more in. Of course, it might be laziness because I don't want to bother taking it out yet.

The butter thing bothers me. I end up taking a piece of bread and scraping the inside of the container to get the rest of the butter.

Anita Helena said...

My husband should be named "the trash compactor"...pretty sure he does it only to avoid taking it out. He's had to deal with many a ripped bag because of all that pushing when he finally does decide to take it out.

I think I can relate to your habits. Mine would be more along the lines of getting all the toothpaste out of the tube, and using every last drop of clothes detergent (using your fill the bottle and swish method)

Loved your post, made me chuckle!

Michael said...

Marcy: Ah, it's partially laziness for me too. My bin's quite small and I would have to take out the trash too frequently if I didn't squash everything down.

Anita: Yes, the ripped bag, and the overstuffed, overflowing bag of rubbish is quite troublesome.

yolanda said...

you and my dad would get on so well. my dad is very laid back, but is unbelievably anal about waste and crushing rubbish. when i first went to college, i remember the thrill i got from throwing uncrushed milk cartons into the bin. rebellion comes in the most bizarre shapes ;)

yolanda

Anonymous said...

I hate food waste espeically and find creative ways to recycle leftovers or else I'll save a leftover in a freezer container and label it "1 serving-spaghetti" or what-have-you.