146 - When someone thinks they're better than you

I hate this, whether it means they think they're smarter, richer, kinder, fitter, faster, cooler, prettier, or more popular, courteous, verbose, moral, loyal, rational, adaptable, experienced, balanced, or correct. To think you're on a "higher level" is nothing short of arrogant; to advertise this exact self-image is just abhorrent.

Benjamin Franklin said: "To be humble to superiors is duty, to equals courtesy, to inferiors nobleness." People with a strong ego scoff behind the authoritarians' backs, look down on, and patronize, their equals, and treat their subordinates like they're scum, or non-existent.

And it's most detestable when such conceit is observed in the people you love. I just... I don't even want to think about it anymore.

125 - When two people with good intentions come to a disagreement

This is a basic facet of social, interpersonal relationships that I don't understand. How the Hell does this happen? Who would be condemned to the Underworld? The one that meant his/her care less passionately? The one that gave advice or suggestions that didn't work? The one that has an inferior record of performing good deeds throughout his/her life? The one that had a slower reaction and offered help later? Or the one that took less time and effort to think of practical, acceptable solutions?

How is it that this happens? Who's to blame? ...I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.

86 - Talking about respect

Alright, bloggers. Think of somebody who you respect highly and by whom you are respected as well. Do you ever talk about the respect you have for one another?

In my experience, respect is a tricky thing to define, give and return, but generally, I believe the less you have to talk about respect with someone, the better. Respect, trust and liking is felt instinctively and cannot be induced by reasonable words alone. Together, they mix together to form a 'bond' known as 'friendship' and that bond can be strong or weak based on the level, and more importantly, the balance of those three aspects (and perhaps some more, please share if you can come up with another component of 'friendship'). My best friend and I mutually trust and respect each other. We don't need to talk about it. We're fine.

But recently, I have been given a lot of crap about me being disrespectful. Often when we say we're 'disrespected', it is because we have certain standards that we apply to others, and in most cases, ourselves, but others are not abiding by these standards. We expect others to meet those standards, to 'respect' your standards, because they should, because they're people that mean something to you, because they should care, but they don't listen, they don't care, and they disappoint you.

Here's where I start to get opinionated.

First, who are you to apply standards to me? What about my standards that you are not abiding by? Why should I respect you first? Why do I feel like you never respect me?

Gosh, talking about respect is a pain up my ass whenever I have to argue with someone about our 'balance' of respect and it just isn't necessary to discuss it if you really were friends that have respect for each other because you'd use your intuition to achieve that balance. You would just tell them out loud every once in a while that you have a lot of respect for him/her, or you would do something that shows you respect the way they handle things in life. And just on the top of my head, respect can come in the form of many things, symbolized by things like tolerance, acceptance, patience, advice, fun, joy, agreement, disagreement, admiration, trust, liking and love, and many others, of course. Instead of demanding for respect, learn to give some first, in the form of any of those aforesaid things is fine...

(This post is a rambling, but in the past month or so, after somebody surprised me by saying he was tired of my disrespectful behavior, I spent some time reflecting on my behavior and found that we were disrespecting each other. The difference is that I am willing to accept that and do something about it to change myself to make the relationship better. After about three weeks of me trying and failing again and again since the New Year, though, it's obvious that you need to have a mutual effort to change. Some people need to look in the mirror before they accuse others of being disrespectful...)

18 - When someone doesn't love you the same way

As you've probably guessed, this is a serious one for a change. It's not a stupid, senseless and mindless habit this time. It's about something deep, something emotional and something astonishingly common. I've had a good seventeen years to find people to love, care for and share with. More than half the time, I've had feelings for them, feelings that I'll just group together into what we know as crushes. When someone does not love you the same way, it means they don't have a crush on you at the time you have a crush on them.

When you think about your own love, the pain and torment of said love originates from the internal struggle, and the ever-lasting wonderment about whether or not the other person likes you back. A whole list of other things can drive you to shed doubtful tears. You may think you don't deserve such a great person as him/her, or you may notice that he/she has some flaws you might not be able to oversee, or you may have external pressures from your family and your peers, or you may be afraid of a little competition, or you may be much accustomed to acting stoic, causing you to think about how you're ever going to change your personality, but the universal thing that makes us most worried about confessing your love is the fear of not getting what you wished for, and the overwhelming heartbreak that comes with rejection.

And then there is the horrible case in which you are already in a relationship, but you have lost your initial spark, and your companion just does not love you the same way as he/she used to in the good ol' days, and it hurts when there is no possible way to rekindle old, passionate flames. Whether or not you're in a relationship, you may give a huge multitude of things: care, effort, time, advice, patience, trust, consistency in character, shoulders for crying on, ears for listening, hands for holding, understanding, respect, etc... You may give all these things, but in the end, it comes down to whether or not they love you the same way - if they have the same feelings you do, and it is a pity when they don't.

I speak of this from experience and having heard many a sad story, I know of this from my friends and my family, my parents in particular as they are divorced and do not love each other in the old respect they did seventeen years ago. Sigh, I am only a seventeen-year-old student, yet life appears so much older, less colorful and more unattractive when I go from class to class. The classrooms reek of sadness thanks to loneliness and the absence of a mutual love, despite the childlike excitement and desire at school, the sparkles in our eyes we get from learning, the work that we do that distracts us from our troubles, the smiles on our faces we use as shields to hide the thoughts that lie deeper within our head.

But, really, who hasn't been rejected? Who has ever been able to escape the love spell, in other words, the curse of affection that consumes the minds of each and every person in my life (especially the important ones)? Why is it that we all want to be loved in the way we love others? What is it that makes us wish the stranger was our friend, wish the friend was our lover? How can my idea of love be different from yours if love is meant to be pure, independent and ever-lasting? Why is love seemingly unfair? Why love at all? Why bother?

This problem occurs a lot.
Do you hate it too?