Monday, March 2, 2009

121 - When someone ruins your day

Today is just one of those days where everything wasn't exactly rosy, but they were good, good enough, and you weren't upset whatsoever. Then comes along the bearer of bad news, the pesky imbecile in class, the old and grumpy grandparents, the idiot that elbowed you hard on the street, or the girl you like who said she can't be with you after you were so sure you were meant for each other, or the mother that said you can't go to study abroad because she can't afford it after you've been so excited for so long, or the best friend who said he doesn't agree with the way you live your life when your dreams are finally being fulfilled.

Why do things ever look like they're gradually looking up, like you've avoided a fall to the ground, or dodged a bullet, only to have the hill steep downwards soon after, to have yourself collapse epically on to the floor, to have the bullet pierce you right through the heart?

I feel this way today, and it feels awful. I've felt this way for about a month now, because I've lost so many things, from a gaming device, through my patience and my best friend, to my appetite and my sleep.

I have lost, and I am lost, but that doesn't mean I wasn't trying hard to keep a smile on my face. He knew I was putting on a brave face, but he didn't care, he thought he'd just ruin my day anyway. I hate it.

6 comments:

Amanda said...

That is how I feel at the moment. Lost and alone. Like I've lost something and I won't ever get it back :( Its a horrible feeling to experience.

Hope you feel better soon Michael

Everyday Housewife said...

Just one of those days, I guess. Hope everything works out, Michael.

Madame DeFarge said...

I can't say that it will all feel better soon, because it probably will sound like some dumb adult cliche. But I really hope it does. And you have to go to UCL, otherwise how on earth can I take you for hot chocolate and cakes?

yolanda said...

michael... i'm thinking of you. i really am. if you need anything please just let me know, ok?

love, yolanda

FrankandMary said...

Sorry for the Black Sabbath kind of day. Sounds like you really do try to get good out of your days, but everything else doesn't cooperate. Most of anything I could say would be cliche, so I will pass, esp since I am new to your blog. Someone new to mine years back said "Don't give up your dreams" on a really low entry & I wanted to slap them ;-0.
~Mary

JoJO a. said...

I know what you mean exactly.
The worse is when you're actually having a GOOD day, only to have it ruined by an insensitive person who needs to get something out of their chest.

tomorrow's another day though, right? I keep trying to convince myself that it is. :)