Friday, January 30, 2009

96 - Obnoxiously wide people on public transportation

I don't mean to complain about those who are fat, but what I'm implying is when people, either willingly or obliviously, are incredibly wide on public transportation seating.

There's always the big construction worker going home from a long day at work, who spreads his legs as far apart as he can, like he's trying to reach both ends of the bloody train. There's the kindergarten punk kid that won't stop squirming and doing somersaults on his seat. There's the old lady that's coming back from the supermarket, plastic bags filled with fish and veggies galore, laid out all over the floor in front of her and the people she's sitting next to on either side. There's the teenager with the loud rock music and headphones, his restless leg shaking up and down, nudging your leg. There's the guy with a lot of bags, or the big, big jacket, or the suitcase, who just can't help but nudge you, but really, really wants to sit down from carrying around that much weight.

And then there's me, the slight germaphobe, who doesn't really like coming into physical contact with strangers (or their fish). There's the pregnant lady who's clamping her legs together because she's afraid the teenage kid's hard rock music will transpire through the air, through her cervix and cause mental illness to her fetus. There's the aged man, who needs a cane to walk about, and who's just absolutely scared as Hell that the kindergartner might knock him in the face with his arm, or accidentally knee his bad hip. There's the mother, who has confidently placed her three-year-old daughter on her own individual seat next to her for the first time, but quickly regrets it when the guy with the big jacket looks as if he's going to completely flatten her dear little girl. And last, but not least, there's the stoic, modern-age businesswoman that's placing her leather briefcase in between her and the construction worker, because she doesn't want the cement dust on his clothes to rub off on her clean, black, formal dress.

7 comments:

Bullshee said...

There's the guy on your flight(economy of course) who's stomach flab actually folds across the arm rest and you have to put your arm ON the flab.

Of course, it was useful as a place to keep my cup....

hrix said...

it is amazing how insensitive human beings can be - that sometimes, it is hard to believe that a thing called brain is actually embedded inside their heads.

~C.

hrix said...

hey. i forgot to tell you: i gave you back the award. That's okay right?

~C.

Comic Superzero said...

I definitely really liked this blog. I don't go on public transportation all that often so it's "nice" (for lack of a better word) to read about it.

You described each person very well.

Kate said...

LOL

E said...

you rock.

Michael said...

Bullshee: That's horrible. LOL.

C: Oh, they have the brains to be inconsiderate. It's the ethical sensibility they lack.

Phil: That's Hong Kong life specifically, by the way.

Kate: :D

Erica: Thanks. I know what I'm talking about. ;)